Non-motoring > A letter from Dave Miscellaneous
Thread Author: Alastairw Replies: 82

 A letter from Dave - Alastairw
Anyone else had a letter from Mr Cameron today?

I live in a target seat for the Tories, so I have been inundated with political leaflets, but today an individually addressed letter from DC came. I assume he got my dets from the electoral roll, but did wonder if he was reusing the database from the Olympics, as the only previous communication I had from Number 10 was his letter of thanks after London 2012.
 A letter from Dave - Old Navy
As many politicians are desperate to remain on a rapidly departing gravy train I would expect that they are using every database they can get their hands on.
Last edited by: Old Navy on Tue 7 Apr 15 at 19:15
 A letter from Dave - sooty123
No and not likely to, we are safe tory world out here in the sticks. More chance of seeing a unicorn than a Lab/LD MP.
 A letter from Dave - Bromptonaut
>> No and not likely to, we are safe tory world out here in the sticks.

Same here. I can confidently predict that Heaton-Harris, Christopher (Conservative) will be duly elected to serve for the constituency of Daventry.
 A letter from Dave - Zero
>> >> No and not likely to, we are safe tory world out here in the
>> sticks.
>>
>> Same here. I can confidently predict that Heaton-Harris, Christopher (Conservative) will be duly elected to
>> serve for the constituency of Daventry.

Who? pffftttt A nobody.

The Right Honourable Philip Hammond PC, Secretary of State for Foreign and Commonwealth Affairs, ex Secretary of State for Defence , ex Secretary of State for Transport, fiercely Eurosceptic, fierce critic of same sex marriages, will be reelected as Member of Parliament for Weybridge & Runnymede with a handsome majority.
Last edited by: Zero on Tue 7 Apr 15 at 19:49
 A letter from Dave - Dave_
We'll have Sir Alan Duncan here again. He's only polled under 50% once in 20 years.
 A letter from Dave - Zero
>> We'll have Sir Alan Duncan here again. He's only polled under 50% once in 20
>> years.

Our bloke will poll a shedload. First thing he did when he became Transport Minister, was to divert budget into building Walton Bridge, now completed.
 A letter from Dave - sooty123

>> Our bloke

Is very competent from what I hear, I know many in the MoD would have liked him to stay on.
 A letter from Dave - Duncan
>> First thing he did when he became Transport Minister, was to divert budget into building Walton Bridge, now completed.
>>

Well perhaps you would like to ask him when the caff and toilets, which appear to have been completed for several months, are going to be opened?

I was there on Sunday, still not open, I was breaking my neck for a J. Carroll!
 A letter from Dave - Old Navy
>> First thing he did when he became Transport Minister,
>> was to divert budget into building Walton Bridge, now completed.
>>

You can't complain about money being diverted to Scotland then.
 A letter from Dave - henry k
>> You can't complain about money being diverted to Scotland then.
>>
No smiley ?

The Walton bridge was a replacement at £32.4M
.
Tell me where a large new bridge is being built ?
The estimated scheme cost is £1.35 billion to £1.4 billion in outturn costs. This allows for optimism bias and VAT. The principal contract (the bridge and approach roads) was awarded on 21 March 2011 for £790 million.
 A letter from Dave - Old Navy
>> The Walton bridge was a replacement at £32.4M
>> .
>> Tell me where a large new bridge is being built ?
>> The estimated scheme cost is.......

www.transportscotland.gov.uk/project/forth-replacement-crossing

The Walton bridge is over a muddy stream not an open sea estuary. :-)
Last edited by: Old Navy on Wed 8 Apr 15 at 13:23
 A letter from Dave - Duncan
>>
>> www.transportscotland.gov.uk/project/forth-replacement-crossing
>>
>> The Walton bridge is over a muddy stream not an open sea estuary. :-)
>>

As an Englishman, you have certainly swallowed the Sweaty propaganda machine.
 A letter from Dave - Old Navy
>> As an Englishman, you have certainly swallowed the Sweaty propaganda machine.
>>

Not at all, anyone who does not realise the huge government subsidies that go to London and the south east is a little naive.
 A letter from Dave - Manatee
>> >> As an Englishman, you have certainly swallowed the Sweaty propaganda machine.
>> >>
>>
>> Not at all, anyone who does not realise the huge government subsidies that go to
>> London and the south east is a little naive.

Well it's not the Scots that are doing the subsidising!
 A letter from Dave - Armel Coussine
Used to live in Crombie, Fife, near Dunfermline, or rather my parents did, and I stayed there sometimes. So I'm interested in all this.

But I can't find any mention of the Walton bridge, no photo, no map, nothing. Where is it ON? Too far up the Forth to feature?
 A letter from Dave - No FM2R
I feel you may be a little confused. The Walton Bridge is, unlike the Forth, in Surrey.
 A letter from Dave - Duncan
>> I feel you may be a little confused. The Walton Bridge is, unlike the Forth, in Surrey.
>>

Well, one end of it is.

The Northern end is planted pretty firmly in Middlesex.
 A letter from Dave - No FM2R
>>The Northern end is planted pretty firmly in Middlesex.

That's the northern end of the Walton Bridge, AC, not the Forth.

Just in case.
 A letter from Dave - Armel Coussine
>> I feel you may be a little confused.

I'm never confused FMR. Like others though I am sometimes misinformed or given erroneous impressions. There's no explicit mention of Walton being in Surrey. Why should I have any idea where it is?

Life's too short to Google everything. But perhaps I should have remembered that there's a Walton-on-Thames, and thought of it as a possibility. No one's perfect.
Last edited by: Armel Coussine on Wed 8 Apr 15 at 14:55
 A letter from Dave - sooty123
>> >> No and not likely to, we are safe tory world out here in the
>> sticks.
>>
>> Same here. I can confidently predict that Heaton-Harris, Christopher (Conservative) will be duly elected to
>> serve for the constituency of Daventry.
>>

Would add mine, but I haven't the foggiest.
 A letter from Dave - zippy
Had a local candidate knock on the door the other day.

I was going to vote for her but I am not sure now!

The reason is that once I let my likely vote known she lost interest and could not get away quickly enough.

I had a few concerns that I wanted to press her on and did not get the chance and if she is going to be like that when in office she may not be a good MP.

The current local MP (a different party) has done a lot for the town so I may stick with her.
 A letter from Dave - Harleyman
Ours is Simon Hart; even if I were not inclined towards Conservative politics I'd be tempted to vote for him. Excellent constituency MP (although his Labour predecessor was pretty good too) and I'm also tipping him for ministerial office in future.
 A letter from Dave - Bromptonaut
>> The reason is that once I let my likely vote known she lost interest and
>> could not get away quickly enough.

Canvassing. Aim is to identify your voters and then make sure you get them out on the day.

If you've declared for the opposition then she's not going to waste her time. I you're for her and are ambulant and motivated to get yourself to the polling station then her job's done too.

If you need a lift to the polling station her people will look after that. Wife's cousin will be out running old ladies to the vote all day on 7th in name holding onto one of the most marginal seats Labour won at last GE.

If you want to get her attention then you need to pose as a positive probable...

 A letter from Dave - Ted

We have a Knight of the Realm looking after us as well....staunchly Labour here, the others don't bother much. Sir Gerald's in his 80s now but I suppose he'll stand again.

Be interesting to see how Kippers and Greens do though. Will have beer in for the night and stock up on crisps. ( Or crips, as my Indian friend calls them.....I don't thinks she's too happy with the sps bit !)
 A letter from Dave - smokie
John Redwood is my local man. Not much chance of that changing.
 A letter from Dave - BobbyG
Don't think Dave will bother sending any letters to my neck of the woods.........
 A letter from Dave - legacylad
Was he known as Spock because he had sticky out ears?
Which reminds me....what's the similarity between Mr Spocks mum & Port Stanley airfield?
 A letter from Dave - legacylad
They were both effed by Vulcans...
 A letter from Dave - bathtub tom
Must remember to print a sign to stick on my door:

NO CANVASSERS.
 A letter from Dave - CGNorwich
Odd word canvassing. Wonder where it comes from
 A letter from Dave - Stuartli
>>Odd word canvassing. Wonder where it comes from>>

To find out your voting in(tent)?

See: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canvassing
 A letter from Dave - Zero
>> Odd word canvassing. Wonder where it comes from

trawled from the web,


The word canvas came into Middle English, via Old Northern French canevas, from the Latin name for hemp, cannabis: hemp is the raw material traditionally used in making canvas, and is also the source of cannabis itself. The noun canvas (earlier spelled with a double -s) is also linked with the verb canvass, which originally meant ‘toss in a canvas sheet’ (a practice carried out both in fun and as a punishment); canvass then came to mean ‘assault, attack’ or ‘criticize’, and later ‘scrutinize in order to reject invalid votes’, from which developed the modern sense, ‘solicit votes’.
 A letter from Dave - CGNorwich
Who would have thought that it shares a common source with cannabis.

That's really quite interesting!

Show how futile it is to try to fix the meaning of words
 A letter from Dave - Bromptonaut
>>
>> We have a Knight of the Realm looking after us as well....staunchly Labour here, the
>> others don't bother much. Sir Gerald's in his 80s now but I suppose he'll stand
>> again.

Looks as though he is standing again. If re-elected he may well be 'Father of the House' though there are other 'survivors' from 1970 including Denis Skinner and Ken Clarke.
Last edited by: Bromptonaut on Wed 8 Apr 15 at 10:07
 A letter from Dave - Roger.
Well - I managed to get the necessary signatures on the nomination form, mostly by cold canvassing! SWMBO is also standing, as is our daughter, (in Suffolk).

My opponent is a sitting Tory in a reasonably prosperous out-of-town ward, so a decent second is probably the best I'll do.

We have a parliamentary candidate, too.
An ordinary bloke, a diesel fitter and our branch chairman.
He's standing against John Mann, (Labour, of course).
With Mann's wife on the local district council, sitting in a cabinet post, plus employing her as his parliamentary secretary, that family are not only earning very well, but also have the local Labour party & vote tied up tighter than a duck's fundament!
 A letter from Dave - Dog
>>Well - I managed to get the necessary signatures on the nomination form, mostly by cold canvassing! SWMBO is also standing, as is our daughter, (in Suffolk).

Good Luck! Dodger, I hope it goes well for you all, and UKIP in general.
 A letter from Dave - Zero
>> Good Luck! Dodger, I hope it goes well for you all, and UKIP in general.

And I hope UKIP, in general gets a kicking. And I will blame them, in general, for foisting us with that no hoper second string milliband with the SNP stick up his ass for the next 5 years.
Last edited by: Zero on Wed 8 Apr 15 at 11:30
 A letter from Dave - BobbyG
>>And I will blame them, in general, for foisting us with that no hoper second string milliband with the SNP stick up his ass for the next 5 years.

And then you will know how it feels to get ran by a Government that your country never voted for...
 A letter from Dave - Zero
>> >>And I will blame them, in general, for foisting us with that no hoper second
>> string milliband with the SNP stick up his ass for the next 5 years.
>>
>> And then you will know how it feels to get ran by a Government that
>> your country never voted for...

Didn't stop you from sucking up all their money tho did it.
 A letter from Dave - No FM2R
>>And then you will know how it feels to get ran by a Government that your country never voted for..

Your "Country"? I thought we'd addressed that issue last year?
 A letter from Dave - Bobby
>>Your "Country"? I thought we'd addressed that issue last year?

Yip, last time I looked, Scotland was still a country.
 A letter from Dave - No FM2R
Its not a *real* one though, is it. Its just a place that voted to be part of the UK.
 A letter from Dave - Manatee
>> >>And I will blame them, in general, for foisting us with that no hoper second
>> string milliband with the SNP stick up his ass for the next 5 years.
>>
>> And then you will know how it feels to get ran by a Government that
>> your country never voted for...

That is a crap argument if you are serious. You voted for previous governments just as much as anybody else!

There are many virtual constituencies that have not always had the government they voted for.

If you want a non-virtual example, Yorkshire has more people than Scotland and also did not elect a Conservative government. To add insult to injury, it has fewer MPs too - Scotland is disproportionately (over)represented at Westminster.

The idea that a party that wants to separate Scotland entirely from the UK should, after a referendum, seek to help form a UK government is outrageous. The SNP should have been dissolved after the plebiscite.
 A letter from Dave - Bobby
>>The idea that a party that wants to separate Scotland entirely from the UK should, after a referendum, seek to help form a UK government is outrageous. The SNP should have been dissolved after the plebiscite.

Cant disagree with this comment at all but it probably just goes to show how ridiculous this whole politics and general election nonsense is becoming.

We should ensure that all the leaders debates are held in court and they must take an oath and if found to be lying on anything, then they get jailed.

If you are a twitter user, you can watch these debates on TV and as x,y or z is promised, there will be someone on twitter posting a link to something online that disproves what the leader is saying. But they get away with it.
 A letter from Dave - No FM2R
>>We should ensure that all the leaders debates are held in court and they must take an oath and if found to be lying on anything, then they get jailed.

Tempting, very tempting.

But in reality all the electorate need do is vote on a politician considering what they promised to do and then how they performed against those promises.

But we don't. We vote on a politician subject to issues reported in the Mail like his hairstyle, where he goes on holiday, whether or not he mistreats the No 10 cat and his kids.

Inevitably we are getting the politicians that we both want and deserve.

As I have said before, beyond all else a politician wants to be in office. He will do whatever it takes to retain his office. If that's wearing nice suits, stroking cats and making sure his wife has the right handbag, then that's what he'll do.

If he actually had to keep his promises, then he'd do that. But he doesn't need to.
 A letter from Dave - Robin O'Reliant
>> >>We should ensure that all the leaders debates are held in court and they must
>> take an oath and if found to be lying on anything, then they get jailed.
>>
>>
A recipe for disaster.

Politicians don't really make promises, they lay out a manifesto of intentions which they would love to carry out to the letter as it would guarantee re-election next time. However, reality gets in the way of a lot of their commitments. An unexpected event or turn of events means the money is no longer there, a well meant intention to reform the Health Service or Education system that looked straightforward on paper turns out to be virtually impossible in practice and goes in the too difficult box, not least because the doctors, nurses and teachers are horrified that they may have to work a bit more efficiently and spend all their time screaming to the media about "Government cuts" and going on strike.

Spread similar problems across every single service and it's a wonder they ever get any reforms done at all.
 A letter from Dave - Duncan
>>
>> And then you will know how it feels to get ran by a Government that
>> your country never voted for...
>>

Perhaps someone should take you to one side and explain slowly and carefully how the British parliamentary system of democracy works.

People can be ruled by a government for which they didn't vote.

Tough, but that's democracy.
 A letter from Dave - Bobby
>>Perhaps someone should take you to one side and explain slowly and carefully how the British parliamentary system of democracy works.

People can be ruled by a government for which they didn't vote.

Tough, but that's democracy.

Oh I know how it works thus your second line there is agreeing with my original point.
 A letter from Dave - Duncan
>> People can be ruled by a government for which they didn't vote.
>>
>> Tough, but that's democracy.
>>
>> Oh I know how it works thus your second line there is agreeing with my
>> original point.

Perhaps I should have said 'minorities can be ruled by governments for which they didn't vote'.

e.g. The people of Surrey have never voted for a Labour government.
 A letter from Dave - Roger.
>> >> Good Luck! Dodger, I hope it goes well for you all, and UKIP in
>> general.
>>
>> And I hope UKIP, in general gets a kicking. And I will blame them, in
>> general, for foisting us with that no hoper second string milliband with the SNP stick
>> up his ass for the next 5 years.
>>

tinyurl.com/mufwzaf
 A letter from Dave - Robin O'Reliant
>>>>
>> Looks as though he is standing again. If re-elected he may well be 'Father of
>> the House' though there are other 'survivors' from 1970 including Denis Skinner and Ken Clarke.
>>
>>
Ah, Dennis Skinner.

The man who wanted compulsory retirement for everybody at 65 in order to give the yoof a chance, then decided it didn't apply to him when he reached that age.
 A letter from Dave - henry k
>> >> Looks as though he is standing again. If re-elected he may well be 'Father of the House' though there are other 'survivors' from 1970 including Denis Skinner and Ken Clarke.
>> >>
>> Ah, Dennis Skinner.
>>
>> The man who wanted compulsory retirement for everybody at 65 in order to give the
>> yoof a chance, then decided it didn't apply to him when he reached that age.
>>
He is only 83 so lots of life left!

ukpollingreport.co.uk/guide/retiring-mps/
 A letter from Dave - Harleyman

>> >>
>> Ah, Dennis Skinner.
>>
>> The man who wanted compulsory retirement for everybody at 65 in order to give the
>> yoof a chance, then decided it didn't apply to him when he reached that age.
>>

Skinner may well qualify as the Father of the House but he's never married it.
 A letter from Dave - Cliff Pope
What happens if a woman becomes the longest serving member?
Mother of the House?
Parent of the House?

Why is no one complaining about the sexist stereotyping?
 A letter from Dave - RichardW
Jimmy Hood here - little chance of that changing since we're in with the former steel works at Ravenscraig. I shall probably vote for an independent if there is one, to help save their deposit!
 A letter from Dave - Bobby
You can't be that far away from me Richard if Ravenscraig is in your area!
 A letter from Dave - RichardW
>> You can't be that far away from me Richard

Lanark
 A letter from Dave - Zero
>> What happens if a woman becomes the longest serving member?
>> Mother of the House?
>> Parent of the House?
>>
>> Why is no one complaining about the sexist stereotyping?

The though of Skinner have gender reassignment is frightening.
 A letter from Dave - Roger.
www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/economics/10935617/After-2020-all-EU-members-will-have-to-adopt-the-euro.html
 A letter from Dave - Zero
errr no they wont.
 A letter from Dave - Armel Coussine
>> errr no they wont.

No they won't. They won't take any notice of the result of the referendum foolishly proposed by the PM either, if (as seems quite possible) the voters such as they are are chivvied into voting for an EU exit.

My comic is very keen on this referendum and not at all keen on the EU. Then again it seems to think Ed Miliband is some sort of dangerous socialist revolutionary with smoking bomb in hand.

I do love our mass media. Every day two or three new political horrors, every day five or six new deadly undiagnosed conditions you're going to die of. They really cheer a fellow up.
 A letter from Dave - No FM2R
>>I do love our mass media. Every day two or three new political horrors, every day five or six new deadly undiagnosed conditions

Its worrying though, isn't it.

If one assumes that they are writing for circulation, then the standard and flavour of stories which seemingly drive circulation don't say very much for the readership.
 A letter from Dave - Armel Coussine
>> If one assumes that they are writing for circulation, then the standard and flavour of stories which seemingly drive circulation don't say very much for the readership.

Yup, got it again FMR. You're really coming on.
 A letter from Dave - No FM2R
What a pile of old tosh - ifs, ands, whys & buts, but no substance.
 A letter from Dave - Zero
well at least dog gave it a thumbs up
 A letter from Dave - Dog
>>well at least dog gave it a thumbs up

A dog maybe, but not this Dog. I've been cooking dinner = ASDA finest Lincolnshire sausages, chips, peas, and tomatoes, all washed down with a mug of Rosey Lea.
 A letter from Dave - Skip
>> >>well at least dog gave it a thumbs up
>>
>> A dog maybe, but not this Dog. I've been cooking dinner = ASDA finest Lincolnshire
>> sausages, chips, peas, and tomatoes, all washed down with a mug of Rosey Lea.
>>

I thought you were veggie ?
 A letter from Dave - Dog
>>I thought you were veggie ?

Gave it up guvnor, I wasn't thriving on it. I gave it a year though - worst year of my life!

:}
 A letter from Dave - Skip
>> >>I thought you were veggie ?
>>
>> Gave it up guvnor, I wasn't thriving on it. I gave it a year though
>> - worst year of my life!
>>
>> :}
>>
I lasted 18 months but the smell of bacon cooking "broke" me !


 A letter from Dave - Dog
>>I lasted 18 months but the smell of bacon cooking "broke" me !

It's quite often the bacon sarnie that gets 'em. I still eat some veggie 'stuff' every week, I don't mind a veggie sausage sandwich, or even a veggie bacon sandwich now and again.

The missus did this recipe the other week, it's a lot of faffing about, but I dare anybody not to like it:

www.mytaste.co.uk/click/index/27946459/
 A letter from Dave - Zero
>> The missus did this recipe the other week, it's a lot of faffing about, but
>> I dare anybody not to like it:
>>
>> www.mytaste.co.uk/click/index/27946459/

Tis but the work of seconds to add 500gm of minced lamb to that to make it perfect.
 A letter from Dave - Dog
>>Tis but the work of seconds to add 500gm of minced lamb to that to make it perfect.

Yep, could do that - give 'ee a go!
 A letter from Dave - Dog
Um, got a letter from Dave today, well, he does take his holly days down here, and his (her) baby was born in the Royal Cornwall Hospital. I'm going to take the letter, and the envelope, into the karzi with me, but not to read.
 A letter from Dave - legacylad
Going to practice your English rather than Kernowek?
 A letter from Dave - Dog
Eu îi voi da un sandviș bacon pentru a vedea cum el mănâncă

:}
 A letter from Dave - Zero
>> Eu îi voi da un sandviș bacon pentru a vedea cum el mănâncă
>>
>> :}

אני מוכן להרוג בשביל כריך בייקון
 A letter from Dave - Dog
Cóż , trzeba mordować świnię do produkcji boczku

Orf now ... MOT :(
 A letter from Dave - legacylad
Whenever I hear the word Dave I think of Papa Lazarou in the League of Gentlemen who called everyone Dave.
Makes me smile
 A letter from Dave - tyrednemotional
>> Whenever I hear the word Dave I think of Papa Lazarou in the League of
>> Gentlemen who called everyone Dave.
>>

Funnily enough.......... ;-)

www.flickr.com/photos/norbet/16440970490/
 A letter from Dave - VxFan
>> Whenever I hear the word Dave

I think, what have I done wrong now.
 A letter from Dave - Zero
>> >> Whenever I hear the word Dave
>>
>> I think, what have I done wrong now.

you name it.
 A letter from Dave - VxFan
>> you name it.

And you'll blame me for it.
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