Honeymoon to France. The new Mrs H flatly refused to drive my eminently suitable Renault 16TX because of the stiff umbrella handbrake and lovely but baffling column shift. So we are batting down the D25 near Royan in her Triumph Toledo and is that antifreeze tainting the air blasting in through the quarterlights? The temperature needle climbs a bit so I pop the front-hinged bonnet to increase the draught. Bad move; a column of green fluid shoots up the windscreen.
The top hose has split and the rusty jubilee clip that I had tightened (OK, I must have overtightened it) a few days ago has vanished. As luck would have it, just behind the hedge where we had stopped was a deserted scrapyard. I did look for the owner but not very hard and I was soon nabbing an enormous hose clip from a rusty Saviem truck. I shortened the top hose and then we topped the Triumph up from something that may have been a cistern, using a plastic shopping bag to hold the oily water.
We didn't need the book on that occasion
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