8:00 am: I made a snowman.
8:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.
8:15 - So, I made a snow woman.
8:17 - My feminist neighbour complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified women everywhere.
8:20 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it should have been two snowmen instead.
8:22 - The transgender man / woman / person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.
8:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and are not to be used to decorate snow figures.
8:28 - I was being called a racist because the snow couple is white.
8:30 - I used food colouring to make one of the snow couple a different colour and be more racially inclusive.
8:37 - Then I was accused of using a black face on the snowperson.
8:39 - The middle eastern gent across the road demanded the snow woman be completely covered.
8:40 - The police arrived saying someone had been offended.
8:42 - The feminist neighbour complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.
8:43 - The 'council on equality' officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.
8:45 - TV news crew from ABC showed up. I was asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I replied "Snowballs" and am now a sexist.
9:00 - I was on the news as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe, and sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.
9:10 - I was asked if I have any accomplices. My children were taken by social services.
9:29 - Far left protesters offended by everything, marched down the street demanding that I be arrested.
9:45 - The boss called and fired me because of the negative association with work that had been all over social media
10:00 - I cry into my drink because all I wanted to do was build a snowman...
Moral: There ain't no moral to this story. It is what this world has become because of a bunch of snowflakes.
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Moral? Its a ruddy miracle, its 31c outside.
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Nice one, Terry - where are you ?
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>> Nice one, Terry - where are you ?
>>
Just north of Bristol. I do appreciate this is not the season of snnowflakes or even mild frosts - but couldn't resist it.
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There's a hint of truth running throughout that post. :(
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More than a hint of exaggeration if you ask me. In real life nothing would happen past 08:00
Last edited by: Zero on Sun 9 Aug 26 at 16:50
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I kinda feel it's the people who imagine that these sorts of scenario are common, and their own lives are being impacted by it ("all I wanted to do was build a snowman"...wah), because they're assaulted by the media with it day in day out, are the real snowflakes. Smells a bit of being unable to tolerate difference to me.
Reality is, the world hasn't changed much. People haven't changed much. The media landscape we consume has changed though, in many ways.
Hey ho. And yes, I know it' supposed to be light hearted. I just don't find it very funny.
Anyway, off to my niece's wedding next week where she's marrying a lovely girl. I can't imagine either of them being remotely offended by anything normal, as this alleged humour implies, they're just normal people themselves.
Why not live and let live.
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It obviously isn't reality. But it does remind us of modern habits which have made the news, mostly in this century, a result of people having an easy outlet for telling anyone willing (or foolish) to listen that they have experienced something that annoys them.
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TBF, its quite fun annoying some of them
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>>Why not live and let live.
Quite.
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Of course the reality is this 'anti-woke' agenda is actually the biggest snowflake of all.
Gammons love to get all hot-and-bothered about stuff that doesn't even affect them.
And Farage is Lord Snowflake of Griftsville.
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Weirdly, I had to scroll back on my family whatsapp to try and work out when we bought my dad's (now not working) TV - and one of my brothers had put this exact Snowflakes poem on the whatsapp 4 years ago!
And the TV was bought in 2018 from Richer Sounds with a a 6 year guarantee - blast! On the plus side, its replacement (LG) will be £50 cheaper than it was!
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Snowflakes - Zero
