Non-motoring > Burial practices.	Miscellaneous
Thread Author: R.P.	Replies: 64

Fri 24 Feb 12 18:51   Burial practices. - R.P.

Slow news day on Wales News today. The below made the TV news. www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-mid-wales-17140489 Any views on practices in your local area or is this guy some sort of nut ? Reply to this message | Report message

Fri 24 Feb 12 18:55   Burial practices. - Runfer D'Hills

They can put me in the skip for all I care when I'm done. Reply to this message | Report message

Fri 24 Feb 12 18:56   Burial practices. - Westpig

>> They can put me in the skip for all I care when I'm done. >> You've got the car for the journey already, haven't you?...;-) Last edited by: Westpig on Fri 24 Feb 12 at 18:57 Reply to this message | Report message

Fri 24 Feb 12 19:04   Burial practices. - Runfer D'Hills

Heh Heh ! A very long time ago, a pal of mine who's dad had a wedding / funeral car business bought an old hearse from his father. He was a keen skier and the hearse was ideal for transporting kit. Anyway, as you might expect, being young and foolish, having access to such a vehicle was a pretty strong temptation. My mate got hold of a coffin one Friday night and one of our company got in it. We set off into town ( Edinburgh ) for a night out. Every time the car stopped at lights or whatever the idiot in the coffin would sit up slowly and turn to stare at passers by... Reply to this message | Report message       1

Fri 24 Feb 12 18:58   Burial practices. - R.P.

Or a shoe box...:-) Reply to this message | Report message

Fri 24 Feb 12 19:49   Burial practices. - Harleyman

They're a bit particular about this sort of thing in Wales. Easy way to rile the natives is to tell them that come the Day of Judgement the dead will rise, and the first thing they see when they look to the east..... ...... will be England! ;-) Reply to this message | Report message

Fri 24 Feb 12 20:25   Burial practices. - Robin O'Reliant

We should be buried upright to save space. Reply to this message | Report message

Fri 24 Feb 12 20:40   Burial practices. - John H

>> We should be buried upright to save space. >> Cremation should be compulsory. Reply to this message | Report message

Fri 24 Feb 12 20:48   Burial practices. - Zero

Apparently all you need to do is load them on to coaches, run them through France and every one of them will be scattered along the Autoroute. Or so i am told. Reply to this message | Report message       2

Sun 26 Feb 12 09:24   Burial practices. - L'escargot

>> They can put me in the skip for all I care when I'm done. >> I'm on the NHS Organ Donor Register, and I've specified that I want to donate any of my organs and tissue for transplantation after my death. Reply to this message | Report message

Sun 26 Feb 12 10:14   Burial practices. - Robin O'Reliant

>> I'm on the NHS Organ Donor Register, and I've specified that I want to donate >> any of my organs and tissue for transplantation after my death. >> I hope you've been CRB checked? Reply to this message | Report message

Fri 24 Feb 12 21:23   Burial practices. - Dog

I used to tune funeral coaches for a couple of funeral directors, one in Blackfriars, London, and another one once we moved to Hastings (St. Leonards) Mainly Ford V6 and Daimler 420 Limo's, I used to road test them afterwards, which was a hoot, I used to take pains over setting them up, and make sure I got them dead right, just in case :( Reply to this message | Report message

Fri 24 Feb 12 21:27   Burial practices. - devonite

must have been a "Hoot" thrashing them around at 5mph!! ;-) Reply to this message | Report message

Fri 24 Feb 12 21:45   Burial practices. - Dog

NOT after I had tuned em pop! :} Reply to this message | Report message

Fri 24 Feb 12 22:29   Burial practices. - Robin O'Reliant

When I was a driving instructor I told Mrs RR that I wanted my hearse to display L plates, stall a couple of times enroute, have the guy in the passenger seat grab the steering wheel to prevent it crossing lanes in front of a truck, cause chaos on a roundabout by signaling the wrong way and then brake sharply at the cemetry gate so the lead car ran into the back of it. It would have been a fitting send-off. I would imagine AC's cortege being instructed to set off a couple of speed cameras on his final journey and then tailgating a Rover with the hearse furiously flashing it's lights. Zero's driver could stop somewhere to have an argument with a random stranger. Humph's would probably have that damn cycle carrier on the back. Last edited by: Robin Regal on Fri 24 Feb 12 at 22:33 Reply to this message | Report message

Fri 24 Feb 12 22:39   Burial practices. - Harleyman

And Pat's coffin will probably be roped and sheeted on a flatbed trailer, only to be turned away from the crem for being five minutes late! ;-) Reply to this message | Report message

Fri 24 Feb 12 23:41   Burial practices. - WillDeBeest

Tee hee. I don't think Pat'll even get that far. She'll be pulled up in a lay-by on the A14 for a compulsory rest (in peace?) break. Reply to this message | Report message

Sat 25 Feb 12 00:04   Burial practices. - VxFan

I want my ashes putting into a rocket and launching skyward. Hopefully some of my remains will land on some of those who have carped on me over the years. Last edited by: VxFan on Sat 25 Feb 12 at 00:05 Reply to this message | Report message

Sat 25 Feb 12 05:11   Burial practices. - Pat

You're closer than you think there HM! I'm going on this i100.photobucket.com/albums/m34/Veeeight/IMG_1758.jpg But with the sideboard dropped down and roped on with perfect dolly knots. Hadn't thought about the 45 minute break W de B;) On the occasion in the photo we had in the back, the ashes of two of our forum members who had died during the previous few months. They were both old friends of mine who I knew personally and always attended Truckfest with us. Ther families both contacted us to see if we could give them a fitting last ride around the main arena and scatter their ashes. We asked for permission and it was granted for us to take them round the ring one last time and it was totally silent from the stands but it was explained to us that we couldn't scatter their ashes in the showground. Traditionally we have a BBQ at the end of the day and as we all sleep in our lorries on the showground and don't have to drive, we had a plan;) About midnight there was around 30 of us groping our way, not entirely sober, towards the main arena with two caskets under our arms! The black humour was hilarious and both Biggus and Mercenary (Steve and Andy) will attend Truckfest in the main arena forever now and would have heartily approved! Pat Last edited by: pda on Sat 25 Feb 12 at 05:12 Reply to this message | Report message

Sat 25 Feb 12 16:28   Burial practices. - borasport

going back to the OP, it sounds like a complete windup to me. I mentioned it to the other people I was out walking with in the welsh borders today, and not only had none of them had ever hear of it, in the victorian churchyard we walked through, all the graves were aligned north south. Is it a case of a couple of constituents with a sense of humour and a gullible councillor ? Reply to this message | Report message

Sat 25 Feb 12 17:15   Burial practices. - zippy

Peoples wishes should be considered. Cremation doesn't do it for me because it seems wasteful. I am not the most religious person in the world and so have thought about a woodland burial. Reply to this message | Report message

Sat 25 Feb 12 17:22   Burial practices. - Iffy

...Cremation doesn't do it for me because it seems wasteful... A barrister who was asking after my new hip remarked I now won't cremate in full - the joint will be left. Reply to this message | Report message

Sat 25 Feb 12 17:43   Burial practices. - Pat

It'll melt Iffy, it's hot down there:) Pat Reply to this message | Report message

Sat 25 Feb 12 17:49   Burial practices. - sherlock47

>> It'll melt Iffy, it's hot down there:) >> >> Pat >> But if you don't make it all the way down, the gas fires in the crem are not hot enough! www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-16877393 Reply to this message | Report message

Sat 25 Feb 12 18:15   Burial practices. - Meldrew

In what way do you think cremation is wasteful iffy? serious question BTW! Is it the energy expended or something else? In some places the heat is re-cycled. Published on Friday 24 February 2012 12:22 "A senior Government minister has backed a controversial scheme to heat a public swimming pool in Worcestershire with energy from a nearby crematorium. Commons Leader Sir George Young praised the "groundbreaking scheme" and said he would "die a happier man" if he knew heat from his cremation was warming the waters of a local pool. The scheme links the crematorium in Redditch with the Abbey Stadium Leisure Centre." I am going for cremation and ash scattering as I wish to be reunited with my late father and one of my children, whose ashes are scattered in a place of signifigance to us as a family. Reply to this message | Report message

Sat 25 Feb 12 19:00   Burial practices. - zippy

>>>In what way do you think cremation is wasteful iffy? It was I, Meldrew, who suggested it was wasteful. ;-) I was thinking of the gas used to burn the body. I did not know of the recycling heat aspect - I doubt it is burning bodies providing the heat, probably waste heat from the furnace. The whole point is that it is nice to be given the choice and everyones should be respected. Last edited by: zippy on Sat 25 Feb 12 at 19:01 Reply to this message | Report message

Sat 25 Feb 12 19:13   Burial practices. - Meldrew

My apologies for the misdirected question! Of course, everyone must organise the end of their life the way that suits them, as I have. Reply to this message | Report message

Sat 25 Feb 12 20:34   Burial practices. - devonite

I`m going "Green"! - My Corpse will be dissolved in a vat of Caustic solution to completely liquify it and turn it to water, this will then be treated and "Chlorinated". then fed into the Southern area`s drinking supply to ease the effects of the Hose-pipe ban! Have a drink on me!! - literally! ;-) Reply to this message | Report message

Sat 25 Feb 12 21:34   Burial practices. - Roger.

Caustic soda plus body fat = soap! Cue for a song - "I'm going to wash that man right out of my hair!" (Heads for exit, cowering under a hail of rotten tomatoes!) Reply to this message | Report message       1

Sat 25 Feb 12 22:50   Burial practices. - Armel Coussine

>> cowering under a hail of rotten tomatoes!) ... but buoyed up slightly by the odd approving snigger... Reply to this message | Report message       1

Sat 25 Feb 12 23:49   Burial practices. - devonite

>>Caustic soda plus body fat = soap!<< Only if you go Sud denly! tinyurl.com/8xo37f9 Reply to this message | Report message

Mon 27 Feb 12 11:46   Burial practices. - TeeCee

Next week in the office of the council's Chief Executive: "Sir, your 11am is here. Mr Burke and Mr Hare with their plans to improve our pool heating and solve our care home budget crisis." Reply to this message | Report message

Sat 25 Feb 12 23:59   Burial practices. - John H

Iffy - If the metal thieves find out about your joint, they will kidnap you and sell you for scrap to a dodgy dealer for cash. Reply to this message | Report message

Sun 26 Feb 12 09:48   Burial practices. - Dog

I was thinking this morning as I lay in bed at 6pm cursing the fact I had forgotten to turn orf the alarm clock, that I had also tuned a car for a mortician. When I knocked on the door for for my wages, he invited me in and took me up-stairs to where he lived, above the mortuary. I was taken aback when I saw he lived in a quite normal home and his children were playing on the floor in front of the TV, I sort-of had this idea that they would all be in black just like the Adams family :) www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z16-deK-o6E&feature=fvst Reply to this message | Report message

Sun 26 Feb 12 09:52   Burial practices. - R.P.

A family acquaintance who runs an undertakers had quite a "different" lifestyle - never got past the lounge but he had a sort of cocktail cabinet fashioned into the shape of a "short" coffin shape. He also ran a red E-type with a local plate with the figures 777 on it (which has some significance in the trade according to my father) - his company was used by Granada for "Street" funerals. Edit...Just Wiki'd 777 its a numerical representation of the Holy Trinity. Last edited by: R.P. on Sun 26 Feb 12 at 09:53 Reply to this message | Report message

Sun 26 Feb 12 10:03   Burial practices. - Dog

Just as well he didn't go for 666. Reply to this message | Report message

Sun 26 Feb 12 10:07   Burial practices. - Meldrew

That's really odd! I would have thought the numerical representation of the Holy Trinity would have been 3! I should get out more, obviously! Reply to this message | Report message

Sun 26 Feb 12 10:13   Burial practices. - Dog

>>That's really odd! I would have thought the numerical representation of the Holy Trinity would have been 3! I should get out more, obviously!<< xtiandefence.blogspot.com/2006/06/number-666-777-jun-6.html Reply to this message | Report message

Sun 26 Feb 12 10:14   Burial practices. - R.P.

I had no clue Meldrew - just remembered a comment of my dad's over forty years ago and only just looked it up. Reply to this message | Report message

Sun 26 Feb 12 11:52   Burial practices. - Dog

She Was Only A Mortician's Daughter But Anyone Cadaver. /(*_*) Reply to this message | Report message       1

Tue 28 Feb 12 15:01   Burial practices. - Mapmaker

>>Edit...Just Wiki'd 777 its a numerical representation of the Holy Trinity. Really? Reply to this message | Report message

Tue 28 Feb 12 15:11   Burial practices. - Focusless

>> >>Edit...Just Wiki'd 777 its a numerical representation of the Holy Trinity. >> >> Really? Easy to look up: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/777_%28number%29#Religious_significance Whether it's right or not... Reply to this message | Report message

Sun 26 Feb 12 10:08   Burial practices. - bathtub tom

>>I sort-of had this idea that they would all be in black just like the Adams family A friend's SIL's called Adam. It doesn't go down too well when he refers to his family with a double click of his fingers: www.youtube.com/watch?v=gFD7KGBUtKI Reply to this message | Report message

Sun 26 Feb 12 10:16   Burial practices. - Dog

>>www.youtube.com/watch?v=gFD7KGBUtKI<< Neat! - I might have a plasma telly, but you can't beat the olde stuff (even in b/w) Reply to this message | Report message

Sun 26 Feb 12 13:54   Burial practices. - franfran

I didn't think it mattered which direction the body faced in. If you look at some old cemeteries, the graves don't always face in the same direction anyway. Reply to this message | Report message

Sun 26 Feb 12 13:55   Burial practices. - R.P.

They were interviewing the Councillor on the TV news - he came across as having er....issues. Reply to this message | Report message

Tue 28 Feb 12 14:56   Burial practices. - Mapmaker

He is perfectly correct. Christian tradition is that Christ will come from the east when he returns, so we are buried so that when we stand up we shall be facing east. That is why churches are oriented east/west. Priests, intriguingly, are buried facing the other way, so that when they stand up from their graves they will be facing us. Reply to this message | Report message

Tue 28 Feb 12 15:01   Burial practices. - Dog

What appens though when we're cremated then cartographer, how we gonna stand up?? Reply to this message | Report message

Tue 28 Feb 12 15:23   Burial practices. - Meldrew

It is widely reported but, as yet science has no answer, that burned people can't stand up! >:) Reply to this message | Report message

Tue 28 Feb 12 15:33   Burial practices. - WillDeBeest

In stark contrast to the wealth of evidence on the erectability of the merely dead. (Or have I been watching too many zombie movies?) }:---) Reply to this message | Report message

Tue 28 Feb 12 15:34   Burial practices. - Dog

I used to ask that question to the Johvers that used to visit me over a 8.5 year period (JW's) "Well Dog (they used to say) He created the world, so that would be nothing at all, to Him". Reply to this message | Report message

Tue 28 Feb 12 17:03   Burial practices. - Robin O'Reliant

>> Priests, intriguingly, are buried facing the other way, so that when they stand up from >> their graves they will be facing us. >> So when we rise again we can't turn round? Fat lot of good that is. Reply to this message | Report message

Tue 28 Feb 12 17:56   Burial practices. - R.P.

My late wife's grave is orientated West/East come to think of it, she is buried in a traditional Church yard. Being an umming and ahhing religious type to whom Qaukerism has a some attraction, I think it's quite a comforting thought. One of my biking buddies is a JW, a mild mannered man of principle, who has had his faith well and truly tested - never tried to influence me in any way. Reply to this message | Report message

Tue 28 Feb 12 19:40   Burial practices. - Dog

Good people JW's (most of em) they don't celebrate Christmas or Easter (like me) Reply to this message | Report message

Tue 28 Feb 12 18:48   Burial practices. - Mapmaker

>> >> Priests, intriguingly, are buried facing the other way, so that when they stand up >> from >> >> their graves they will be facing us. >> >> >> So when we rise again we can't turn round? >> >> Fat lot of good that is. >> I think you're missing the point! Reply to this message | Report message

Tue 28 Feb 12 21:08   Burial practices. - WillDeBeest

Point, MM? I understand that there may once have been one, and that the Apostolic Creed (have I remembered this right?) still refers to 'the resurrection of the body and the life everlasting', but nobody still believes it's going to happen like that, do they? Reply to this message | Report message       1

Wed 29 Feb 12 00:19   Burial practices. - franfran

I seem to recall something in the news a few years ago about a man who purchased the crypt directly above Marilyn Monroe's insisting on being interred facing downwards.... Reply to this message | Report message

Wed 29 Feb 12 08:47   Burial practices. - Dog

www.examiner.com/arts-entertainment-in-sacramento/want-to-be-buried-next-to-marilyn-monroe-lady-selling-crypt-next-to-mm-s-on-ebay Reply to this message | Report message

Wed 29 Feb 12 08:20   Burial practices. - Cliff Pope

>> Christ will come from the east when >> he returns, so we are buried so that when we stand up we shall be >> facing east. >> But our souls haven't been buried, they are all in heaven, aren't they? So will there be a mad scramble of souls trying to relocate their bodies, some of which will have been long removed in council clearance schemes, stolen, used in medical research, etc ? Reply to this message | Report message       1

Wed 29 Feb 12 10:35   Burial practices. - bathtub tom

>>there be a mad scramble of souls trying to relocate their bodies Reminds me of the joke about why dogs sniff each others nether regions. Reply to this message | Report message

Wed 29 Feb 12 14:46   Burial practices. - L'escargot

>> Reminds me of the joke about why dogs sniff each others nether regions. >> Don't keep it to yourself! I could do with a good laugh right now. Reply to this message | Report message

Wed 29 Feb 12 14:55   Burial practices. - Zero

Once upon a time all dogs were invited to a party. When they arrived at the party they were required to leave their butts at the door. All the dogs hung them on hooks by the door. The party went on and the dogs were having a great time. All of a sudden a fire broke out. The dogs raced to the door and grabbed whichever butt they could grab first. that is why, to this very day, dogs sniff each other's In an effort to find their own butt. Reply to this message | Report message

Wed 29 Feb 12 15:09   Burial practices. - bathtub tom

That's got to be about the cleanest version I've ever come across. Reply to this message | Report message

Wed 29 Feb 12 15:11   Burial practices. - Zero

People get easily offended here. Being a brainless idiot whose username corresponds with my IQ I have to be very careful. Last edited by: Zero on Wed 29 Feb 12 at 15:12 Reply to this message | Report message

Wed 29 Feb 12 15:59   Burial practices. - Iffy

I did an arsonist today who had an IQ of 57. "You can't lock her up judge, she's too thick," is a summary of her barrister's submissions. And the judge didn't lock her up. Not sure what the co-accused made of it - he got five years. Reply to this message | Report message