Zippy. Cheer Miss Z up a bit and tell her about Matt Hancock's hospital tour.
Recently Matt Hancock was visiting a hospital. As always, he was looking for something to beat the NHS with to show how badly run and wasteful they were. Hancock checked all the books and then did his tour.
While on the tour he turned to the ward manager and said, "I notice you buy and use a lot of bandages. What do you do with all the plastic middles out of the roll?"
"Good question", noted the ward manager, "We save them up and send them back to Johnson and Johnson and every once in a while, they send us a free box of bandages. We recycle whenever possible."
"Oh" he said, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer. But on he went with his tour to the next ward.
"What about all these coloured casts you dispense. They seem to be rather a waste of money?"
"Ah, yes", she replied, "We ask that any patient wanting a coloured cast donates £1, which is far in excess of the 10p the colouring actually costs".
Hancock was determined to fluster the ward manager so on they went to the next ward.
"Well, what do you do with all the remains from the circumcision surgeries?"
"Here too we do not like waste", said the manager.
"What we do is save all the little foreskins and send them to the government in London and about once a year, at this exact time, they send us a complete prick".
Last edited by: Kevin on Wed 6 Jan 21 at 23:43
|