A Politician dies and arrives at the Pearly Gates, St Peter lets him in and shows him to a room with hundreds of clocks on the walls, all telling different times and running at different speeds.
"Wait here" instructs St Peter, "Whilst we review your life and set your clock".
"what are all these clocks"? asks the Politician.
"Well these clocks show how many lies they have told to their Constituents in the course of their lives, - the faster they go, the more lies they have told" He explains.
After a good look around at the various clocks, He asks St Peter " where is Boris Johnson's clock"?
St Peter replies "I'm using that one in my office, - as a ceiling fan!"